Ben's Journey to Elyos: Azure Twins by nickhalperin, literature
Literature
Ben's Journey to Elyos: Azure Twins
In an Elusian boat. Marni: smooth sailing. At this rate, we’ll be the first ones in Firene. Mauvier: it would seem so Marni: wonder why Zephia told us to go ahead. Our orders are to kill everyone we see. With this kinda head start, think of the body count we can get, we’ll be heroes. Seems like Zephia really taken a shine to us, don’t you think, Mauvier. Mauvier: I do not particularly care. I have my orders and i will follow them. Marni: ugh. See this is why i can’t stand you!! You never praise me and you’re no fun at all!! And I thought Griss was bad. At least he’s not the boringest man in the world. Elusian soldier: Lady Marni, Sir Mauvier, Sir Daniel. Marni: you got something to report? Elusian Soldier: two soldiers have deserted the fleet. Mauvier: perhaps they have some reservations about the current strategy. Marni: whatever. Leave them be. We’ll catch up later and beat the daylights out of them. Elusian soldier: um but they took an Emblem Ring. Marni: what?!! Mauvier:
In Scuttle Town Shantae: what a good day. Sky: hey Shantae. Shantae: hi Sky. Sky: how are you? Shantae: (smiles) great. Scuttle Town is peaceful. Sky: it sure is. Shantae. How are you, Sky? Sky: (smiles) pretty good. I'm going to meet a friend. See ya. (leaves) Shantae: bye Sky. She sees a thief running with stolen money. The Half-Genie throws a rock at a flower pot and it knocks the thief out. The town guards arrests him. Shantae: that's how you catch a thief. A portal opens. Shantae: oooh a portal. Ret-2-Go. (goes through the portal) In Purgatory. A Star Warrior brings a box to Alan. Alan: ah its here. He opens the box and it’s a green gem. Alan: the Life Gem. A powerful crystal that has the power of life and death. Vulkanus: what does it do? Alan: it has the power to bring people back from the grave. Realm Emperor: (in astral form) so it simply bring someone from the dead? Alan: not only that, my lord. It can also call forth a soul from the River of Styx in the Underworld.
Nigredo in party. In a party. Lois: what a good party. She eats a sandwich. Lois: it's really good. Albedo meet her. Albedo: hello Lois. Lois: hey Albedo. How are you? Albedo: (smiles) pretty good. I brought my sister for the party. Lois: that's great. Nigredo appears. Nigredo: hello. I'm Nigredo. Albedo's big sister. Lois: I'm Lois Griffin. Nice to meet you. Your hair's blocking your face? When she moves the hair, she sees Nigredo's hideous face. Lois: oh my god. What happened to your face?! Nigredo: i was designed by my creator Tabula. Lois: who's Tabula? Albedo: he's a Supreme Being who created me and Nigredo. Lois: oh i see. Quagmire appears. Quagmire: hey Lois. Lois: hey Quagmire. Quagmire: i see that those chicks chat with you. Lois: yes. This is Albedo and Nigredo. Quagmire: you two are hot and (sees Nigredo's face) ewwww!!!! (runs away) Nigredo: what's his problem? Lois: no offence Nigredo but no man wanna date a woman with a hideous face like yours. Nigredo: oh i
Good Idea Bad Idea 164 by nickhalperin, literature
Literature
Good Idea Bad Idea 164
It's time for Good Idea Bad Idea Good Idea Fix a car. In a garage. Homer: (fixes his car) woohoo it works. Bad Idea Kick a car. In a garage. Frank: (kicks his car) work you piece of junk. He kicks it. The car explodes, sending Frank flying to a wall. Frank: ouch. Nelson: haha. The End.
In God Realm. In temple of Light. Giant Ciana walks Ciana: wow this temple is really nice. She sees giant Palutena petrified. Ciana: wow whoever the goddess is must have a big statue. She goes to the statue closely. Ciana: (hears her breathing) it’s a real goddess. Don’t worry, sweetie. I’ll wake you up in a minute. She pulls out the Phoenix Quill and use it. This wakes and depetrifies Palutena. Palutena: (yawns and stretches herself) what a good sleep. Ciana: hello. Palutena: oh hello. Who are you? Ciana: i'm Ciana the Light Goddess. Palutena: i'm Palutena. The Goddess of Light. Ciana: nice to meet you. Palutena: i'm surprised a goddess like you visit me. Ciana: i'm curious about your temple. Palutena: sweet. Ciana: so how did you get petrified? Palutena: i need a nap for 2 weeks. Ciana: you look like a divine sleeping beauty. Palutena: (smiles) thanks. Let's go outside for a moment. Ciana: right. Outside the temple. The goddesses lie on the grassland. Palutena: it's a nice
In a street. Kazuma: what a good day. He goes and takes a magazine. Kazuma: cool magazine. He leave the store. Store owner: hey you gotta pay for that. Kazuma: (snaps his fingers) gone. (leaves) Store owner: what? In a store. Kazuma: (eats donuts) they taste good. He walks. Kyouya: Kazuma. I challenge you to a duel. Kazuma: i have something for you. (snaps his fingers) gone. (leaves) Kyouya: hey!!! Later in a mall. Kazuma: (snaps his fingers) gone. (snaps his fingers) gone. (snaps his fingers) gone. No line for me. He walks to a store and drives a motorcycle. Kazuma: hell yeah!! He drives and and lands on Hank Hill's car, damaging it. Hank: what the hell, punk?! Kazuma: (snaps his fingers) gone. Hank: awww. (leaves) Kazuma: best day ever. The End.
In a street. Angry Succubus: (sees a magazine) oooh a newspaper. She reads it. It says "Megumin is popular" Angry Succubus: that brat is popular than me? She rips it and explodes. The End.
Ben's Journey to Elyos: Azure Twins by nickhalperin, literature
Literature
Ben's Journey to Elyos: Azure Twins
In an Elusian boat. Marni: smooth sailing. At this rate, we’ll be the first ones in Firene. Mauvier: it would seem so Marni: wonder why Zephia told us to go ahead. Our orders are to kill everyone we see. With this kinda head start, think of the body count we can get, we’ll be heroes. Seems like Zephia really taken a shine to us, don’t you think, Mauvier. Mauvier: I do not particularly care. I have my orders and i will follow them. Marni: ugh. See this is why i can’t stand you!! You never praise me and you’re no fun at all!! And I thought Griss was bad. At least he’s not the boringest man in the world. Elusian soldier: Lady Marni, Sir Mauvier, Sir Daniel. Marni: you got something to report? Elusian Soldier: two soldiers have deserted the fleet. Mauvier: perhaps they have some reservations about the current strategy. Marni: whatever. Leave them be. We’ll catch up later and beat the daylights out of them. Elusian soldier: um but they took an Emblem Ring. Marni: what?!! Mauvier:
In Scuttle Town Shantae: what a good day. Sky: hey Shantae. Shantae: hi Sky. Sky: how are you? Shantae: (smiles) great. Scuttle Town is peaceful. Sky: it sure is. Shantae. How are you, Sky? Sky: (smiles) pretty good. I'm going to meet a friend. See ya. (leaves) Shantae: bye Sky. She sees a thief running with stolen money. The Half-Genie throws a rock at a flower pot and it knocks the thief out. The town guards arrests him. Shantae: that's how you catch a thief. A portal opens. Shantae: oooh a portal. Ret-2-Go. (goes through the portal) In Purgatory. A Star Warrior brings a box to Alan. Alan: ah its here. He opens the box and it’s a green gem. Alan: the Life Gem. A powerful crystal that has the power of life and death. Vulkanus: what does it do? Alan: it has the power to bring people back from the grave. Realm Emperor: (in astral form) so it simply bring someone from the dead? Alan: not only that, my lord. It can also call forth a soul from the River of Styx in the Underworld.
Nigredo in party. In a party. Lois: what a good party. She eats a sandwich. Lois: it's really good. Albedo meet her. Albedo: hello Lois. Lois: hey Albedo. How are you? Albedo: (smiles) pretty good. I brought my sister for the party. Lois: that's great. Nigredo appears. Nigredo: hello. I'm Nigredo. Albedo's big sister. Lois: I'm Lois Griffin. Nice to meet you. Your hair's blocking your face? When she moves the hair, she sees Nigredo's hideous face. Lois: oh my god. What happened to your face?! Nigredo: i was designed by my creator Tabula. Lois: who's Tabula? Albedo: he's a Supreme Being who created me and Nigredo. Lois: oh i see. Quagmire appears. Quagmire: hey Lois. Lois: hey Quagmire. Quagmire: i see that those chicks chat with you. Lois: yes. This is Albedo and Nigredo. Quagmire: you two are hot and (sees Nigredo's face) ewwww!!!! (runs away) Nigredo: what's his problem? Lois: no offence Nigredo but no man wanna date a woman with a hideous face like yours. Nigredo: oh i
Good Idea Bad Idea 164 by nickhalperin, literature
Literature
Good Idea Bad Idea 164
It's time for Good Idea Bad Idea Good Idea Fix a car. In a garage. Homer: (fixes his car) woohoo it works. Bad Idea Kick a car. In a garage. Frank: (kicks his car) work you piece of junk. He kicks it. The car explodes, sending Frank flying to a wall. Frank: ouch. Nelson: haha. The End.
In God Realm. In temple of Light. Giant Ciana walks Ciana: wow this temple is really nice. She sees giant Palutena petrified. Ciana: wow whoever the goddess is must have a big statue. She goes to the statue closely. Ciana: (hears her breathing) it’s a real goddess. Don’t worry, sweetie. I’ll wake you up in a minute. She pulls out the Phoenix Quill and use it. This wakes and depetrifies Palutena. Palutena: (yawns and stretches herself) what a good sleep. Ciana: hello. Palutena: oh hello. Who are you? Ciana: i'm Ciana the Light Goddess. Palutena: i'm Palutena. The Goddess of Light. Ciana: nice to meet you. Palutena: i'm surprised a goddess like you visit me. Ciana: i'm curious about your temple. Palutena: sweet. Ciana: so how did you get petrified? Palutena: i need a nap for 2 weeks. Ciana: you look like a divine sleeping beauty. Palutena: (smiles) thanks. Let's go outside for a moment. Ciana: right. Outside the temple. The goddesses lie on the grassland. Palutena: it's a nice
In a street. Kazuma: what a good day. He goes and takes a magazine. Kazuma: cool magazine. He leave the store. Store owner: hey you gotta pay for that. Kazuma: (snaps his fingers) gone. (leaves) Store owner: what? In a store. Kazuma: (eats donuts) they taste good. He walks. Kyouya: Kazuma. I challenge you to a duel. Kazuma: i have something for you. (snaps his fingers) gone. (leaves) Kyouya: hey!!! Later in a mall. Kazuma: (snaps his fingers) gone. (snaps his fingers) gone. (snaps his fingers) gone. No line for me. He walks to a store and drives a motorcycle. Kazuma: hell yeah!! He drives and and lands on Hank Hill's car, damaging it. Hank: what the hell, punk?! Kazuma: (snaps his fingers) gone. Hank: awww. (leaves) Kazuma: best day ever. The End.
In a street. Angry Succubus: (sees a magazine) oooh a newspaper. She reads it. It says "Megumin is popular" Angry Succubus: that brat is popular than me? She rips it and explodes. The End.
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